"Revenge is no longer on my mind. Now, revolt is on my mind."
I’m taking action because I finally understand that no one is coming to save us. I finally see that waiting for our leaders to come to their senses about sexual trauma and the treatment of women is not an option. I am leading survivors to healing so that we can force change to happen on our own. We’re tired of waiting, we’re tired of debating, we’re tired of being questioned. It’s time for action.
There is so much to take in with this Supreme Court nomination process - the situation has grown far beyond just politics. As a nation, we are now evaluating where we stand on women’s rights, sexual abuse/assault/harassment, and what we are going to deem acceptable from our governing bodies and the men in our lives. Watching these hearings has an eerie parallel to my own family.
I am one of the few women who have not been a victim of sexual assault, but many women in my family are survivors themselves. Their experiences have shaped every aspect of my life. Trauma is passed down generations through not only DNA, but also in our behaviors and habits. My family members have been victim to a man who was a family friend, who violated the trust placed in him, and who still walks free to this day because our legal system fails women every single day. Those experiences have shaped my life in many ways. I don’t like being touched by strangers. I immediately scan any room I walk into for exits and potential weapons, should I need to defend myself. I resisted doing my hair and makeup or caring about my body or my fashion choices for a long time because I was taught by society that taking care of yourself physically inevitably invites assault. Questions like “what were you wearing” and “what did you do to make this man notice you” still ring in my ears when choosing an outfit for the day. Every choice I’ve made in the past and still to this day is colored by the sexual trauma caused by one evil man.
It’s been difficult for me and women everywhere to stay caught up on current events because every day brings a new horrific story, a new “trusted” man who turned out to be a predator, another politician shouting in outrage that these women are lying, another man doing whatever it takes to protect their political interests rather than face the truth about our society.
The truth is that this extreme masculine society WILL NOT BE TOLERATED ANYMORE. The feminine is rising to balance out this extreme domination and degradation that has been taking place for centuries. Women in the past were nothing more than political pawns, their bodies being traded to unite nations or families, nothing more than baby-making machines to continue a man’s lineage, nothing more than a pretty little thing to look at in the office. Women are not standing for it anymore, and the abusive men in this country have a lot to answer for. I do not believe that #AllMenAreTrash, and I value many good men in my life that stop their friends from continuing a sexist or rape culture thought, who hear me when I tell them of the horrors women live through, who have treated me with respect and value. However, we need to right the centuries of wrongs that have been placed on women. I am tired of hearing story after horrific story of rape, abuse, and assault. I am tired of the first reaction from our leaders being that she must be “a money hungry opportunist”, or she would’ve come forward sooner.
I was angry for a long time. I was angry about what happened to my family, both the abuse and the blatant disregard for their pleas for help towards law enforcement. I was angry that the world I lived in so degraded women that it’s willing to just toss them aside and continue on as if their experience wasn’t real. Now, I’m not angry anymore. I’ve released my emotions surrounding this abuse because my anger was keeping me paralyzed, no good was coming from me being angry. Once I released it, the clarity came flooding in.
Revenge is no longer on my mind. Trying to make these privileged, stubborn, politically-blinded men open their hearts to this ocean of pain is no longer on my mind. I am tired of waiting for the day these men understand. Now, revolt is on my mind. A revolt is rising up against the darkness and injustice in the world, but I won’t be doing it their way, playing along with their rules. I’m taking my revolt to the people. To the women and men who have experienced this evil, who have suffered in silence, or who have tried to find justice, but found only disbelief and political games. My revolt will take place one person at a time, healing one survivor at a time, releasing them from their emotional prison inflicted on them by someone looking for power at any cost. My whole life, my whole path has been leading to this conclusion - that waiting for the powers that be to do the right thing will do NOTHING for us. That if we want change, we have to go out and make it fucking happen ourselves.
I am an intuitive life coach, specializing in generational and sexual trauma, and it’s my responsibility to step up and allow survivors to find me and get the healing they need to turn their trauma into their biggest power. I’ve worked through my own family’s trauma for years, just recently finding peace for myself. Now I’m ready to help you do the same thing.
I am a Reiki master, and during my training, I decided that the traditional hands-on approach does not work for me. I personally do not like being touched by people unless I deeply trust them (a behavior passed onto me by means of my family’s trauma), so I knew that I could never achieve relaxation and healing in a hands-on Reiki energy healing session. Because I felt that way, I never wanted to put my future clients in that same uncomfortable position of being touched by someone they barely know. So I decided to practice hands-off Reiki, meaning I do not touch the physical body at any time, I stay in the energy field and deliver Reiki healing that way. All this time, I didn’t see the connection in my family’s experience and the way I practice Reiki. I only saw what was right in front of me when I released my anger. I’ve researched and researched, and have not found any other practitioner conducting their sessions this way, and that makes me feel like I am a meant to help trauma survivors. I am meant to create a brand new safe space for these people to feel comfortable receiving healing in this way. Trauma survivors need different ways of healing, and so far it seems our practices are still catching up. Traditional Reiki is wonderful, but leaves out trauma survivors who can’t bear to be touched. I am proud to know that I am opening another avenue of healing for these beautiful souls.
I discovered this connection between my personal choices and my professional path through these hearings. I’ve discovered that my whole path has been leading me to helping sexual trauma victims. My hands-off Reiki approach and my experience walking through and releasing trauma makes me the perfect professional to help sexual trauma survivors heal and move forward.
Together, we are changing the way society works. The men and women who are still struggling to pick a side should understand that there is no turning back. We will break this darkness the easy way or the hard way. The easy way will be to believe these victims, hold these predators accountable, and make laws that protect women. The hard way will be to defend these predators, uphold these antiquated laws, and keep degrading women. Believe me, if you choose the hard way, we will fight. Every woman I know is fed up with being shamed, ignored, and abused, so hear me when I say we will fight. We will protest. We will share our stories so that the statistics cannot be ignored. We will vote for change, and most importantly, we will walk through our own darkest traumas to heal, so that we can unite and become a wave of healing, strength, and progress. We’ve lost trust in our political leaders, we’ve lost trust in our religious leaders, we’ve lost trust in our society, so we’re placing our trust in each other. We’re banding together to create a powerful force of change that will not stop until every woman feels safe and secure.
If you are a survivor of sexual trauma, or see the patterns of generational trauma in your family, please reach out to me. My whole purpose on this planet is to guide survivors through their pain to take back control and not let that dark evil control their lives long after the experience is over. Join me to take back your power. Join me to find your healing. Change is coming, so get in or get out of the way.